Changes

I have never really liked changes. As I look at that statement I wonder if there is anyone out there that really does.  There are so many changes going on around my life at this time.  My body and hormones are all crazy -never used to cry, now I'm never sure when or where is it going to happen.  Where I used to be able to tell you the exact day and almost time I was going to start my cycle, is now a crap shoot if it is going to happen and when it does, how long it is going to last. Thankfully I have a wonderful OB/GYN who is really helping me battle this - and without hormone treatments!!
Changes are happening at work. The place I work  for is very secretive in their operations and what they are planning to do. But there are those of us that are realist and can look at the writing on the wall and see that changes are coming. This past Monday, even though we are in the red this year, they hired a new girl to start billing. Billing is my job...hmmm.   Things have been super slow and I have been scrambling to keep myself busy. Today two of my billing branch tickets went to this new girl to learn to do. Therefore I am really - really trying to find something to do.  It is not uncommon for this company to bring people in and replace you without you even know what is going on.  So right now I am holding my breath waiting to see what is going to happen. Yes, I know I will be okay. I really do not have anything to worry about. But change, again is not my friend.
There are changing coming in the future that I am reminded of every time I talk with my parents. My mother has suffered with Type II diabetes since I was born and it is now finally starting to take its toll on her body. I know the loss of my parents, dear aunts and uncles, and those I grew up with and love dearly is coming. It seems like a terrible, morbid thought but again it is a real thought that I can not push away. I have friends who have lost dear loved ones and make the comments like, "If I just had that one more phone call", or " Just to see and hug them one more time".  =(  I know I am certainly not going to like that change.
There have got to be good changes... The girls and I moving has been a good change. Not for everyone, I know this. But for me it has been a good start on fixing myself. Change in hairstyle has been a good one also. I love my short hair - Up until I got married I generally always kept my hair short. 20 years of trying to figure a way of wearing it long and it not killing my neck and I was done with it.  Now it is very short, straight and forms around my face. I love it!! A great change.
Maybe I'm saying this all wrong but it's the thoughts going through my head on this Friday Eve.